I don't think anyone should write their autobiography until after they're dead.

Give me a couple of years, and I'll make that actress an overnight success.

The harder I work, the luckier I get.

I had a monumental idea this morning, but I didn't like it.

Any man who goes to a psychiatrist ought to have his head examined.

A hospital is no place to be sick.

I read part of it all the way through.

No person who is enthusiastic about his work has anything to fear from life.

A wide screen just makes a bad film twice as bad.

Why should people go out and pay money to see bad films when they can stay at home and see bad television for nothing?

Go see it and see for yourself why you shouldn't go see it.

When someone does something good, applaud! You will make two people happy.

The Oscars are a lot different when you are a nominee. You walk around with this big smile on your face, and everyone, even people who work for rival film companies, tells you they voted for you.

The harder I work, the luckier I get.

Give me a smart idiot over a stupid genius any day.

Please write music like Wagner, only louder.

A bachelor's life is no life for a single man.

I think luck is the sense to recognize an opportunity and the ability to take advantage of it... The man who can smile at his breaks and grab his chances gets on.

Include me out.