I took an acting class. After the first day, the teacher quit, so they said take another. When I saw 'How to be a Stand-up Comedian,' it resonated. I realized I'd rather make 200 people laugh than make one person cry.

I've been on so many blind dates, I should get a free dog.

My mom was a ventriloquist and she always was throwing her voice. For ten years I thought the dog was telling me to kill my father.

My husband and I had recently been in a car accident, and I came out of that experience with more clarity about my career and the energy to continue to pursue it hard, no matter what the challenges.

Is there a doctor in the house? My parents want me to marry you.

I've been on so many blind dates, I should get a free dog.